John Kaminski
From a writer to his readers
Sun Jun 29 02:31:28 2003
208.152.73.76

From a writer to his readers

By John Kaminski
skylax@comcast.net

This is a personal message to all those who have read my stories and
exchanged e-mails with me. It continues to be one of the great honors of
my life that so many of you hold me in high regard and with your
grateful and eloquent expressions have shared your appreciation for the
things I've written.

As you learned in my previous piece, "The lies of our leaders," my
nine-month run posting essays via e-mail to individuals and various
internet sites such as rense.com, scoop.co.nz, lewisnews.com,
questionsquestions.net, serendipity.li, worldnewsstand.net,
timewedo.com, globalresearch.ca, onlinejournal.com, headblast.com,
libertypost.org, americanstateterrorism.com, al-jazeerah.info, the
American Patriot Friends Network, many indymedia sites and dozens of
other news pages and e-mail news bulletins such as
informationclearinghouse.info is now in jeopardy of coming to an end,
owing to a problem that assails so many of us these days — lack of cash.

Of the 70 or so pieces I've posted since I began this rant run in
the autumn of 2002, I have not received a dime for any of them. Nor was
that my intention when I wrote them. I wrote them because I needed to
write them, and because I felt they needed to be written.

That's the only reason I write them ... that, and because I can. I
feel the world is at a pivot point as we share these words, where the
forces of evil and deception are about to complete their installation of
a giant mindlock on the people of this planet, and all humanity will be
either erased, bought off, or somehow mutated into mere numbers on some
anonymous computer printout. It has always been and will be my intention
to prevent this from happening as best I can.

Lately I have noted that a collection of my essays titled "America's
Autopsy Report" is soon to be published by Dandelion Books. This
collection includes many of my pieces from winter 2002-03, such as "No
One Is Safe From America's Killer President," "Why Your Vote Won't
Matter," "When Medicines Are Meant To Kill," "Ghost Dance," "How Our
Schools Create Sheeple," "The World Can't Trust What America Says," and
"The Real Terrorist is George W. Bush."

In addition, a second volume of my work is well underway,
tentatively titled "The Perfect Enemy," and containing that essay of the
same name as well as "9/11 Was A Hoax," "All Americans Are Now War
Criminals," "Solving the Enigma of Media Manipulation," and "Horror in
Your Own Home," among many others.

As I calculated my finances back in the spring, it seemed like I
could get this project underway, make a few bucks off the books, and
continue posting my essays on similar topics in need of the spotlight,
as well as surfing the best sites around the world in search of clues
that could help us all monkeywrench the war machine. But it hasn't
worked out that way.

As a novice in the publishing world, I underestimated the time it
would take from completion of manuscript to actual selling of the books.
After five months since signing a contract, I still have not received
the books, and have run out of money to support myself. So the whole
project — not to mention my whole life — is in jeopardy.

And I have now to make a startling admission. For the past few
months, many have noticed the slackening of my usual pace, not only of
pieces I'd written, but of e-mail forwards and responses. Apologies to
all those whose questions I have neglected. I must plead guilty to
dereliction of duty. But I had the best excuse in the world, the only
excuse that would have made me do such a thing that was so against my
nature. After 16 years of being single and essentially without a
girlfriend, I fell in love.

It was a reader who singled me out, e-mailed me, then we talked on
the phone, and one thing led to another, if you know what I mean. It was
three weeks of sheer heaven, though the e-mails — from one to three
hundred a day — began piling up. Instead of cranking my usual 12 hours a
day hurrying through the day's mail and writing stories, I found myself
drugged in a delightful daydream. At age 58, it came as a real shock to
discover that I had finally found the woman of my dreams, and so it
seemed, for a time, that she had found her man. It was the only thing
that could have taken me away from my computer, and it did.

So night after night, instead of processing the day's news and
analyzing it for new pieces to write, I would instead get lost in
dreamier pursuits, though as it evolved, it often became watching her
sleep, and wishing we were younger.

On some of those nights I'd stir at 4 a.m., as I often do when I get
up and write some of my best pieces. But when I'd attempt to go home and
check my hundreds of e-mails, she'd object, and accuse me of caring more
about my computer than her. The beginning of the end.

But she believed in me, and implemented an ingenious website plan
that would enable me to sell autographed copies of my book by the push
of a button on a variety of websites. Good plan. Bad reality. I still
don't have the books. The website moldered and was taken out of service,
complicated by a stunning and unexpected denial of service by the outfit
that was supposed to process the credit card orders. All because of my
bad credit and lack of resources.

Mixing money and love takes a toll. As my friend the popular Rense
columnist Jude Moriarty put it, "I fear dear John, that when finances
enter into a relationship ... one in need of the other's largesse, a
shadow enters in ... many times unspoken, but it's there just the
same." And so it was.

And I'll never understand how someone could be jealous of e-mails
that I was always perfectly willing to share, but that's how it came
down, and that's how it came to be I haven't written at my usual pace
these past few months.

And now that this divide has widened into suspicion and contempt,
the whole plan to sell autographed books on the web has blown up in my
face, and floated away on the fetid Florida air. Worse, the woman of my
dreams is gone, and I am left alone to contemplate the possibility that
all my life I've been living a lie, and that all those women (well, not
that many) I said I loved I only wanted to sleep with, which is what she
continued to insist to the end. It is a question I continue to
contemplate, that the dream I most dearly sought in all the world was a
selfish deception of conquest and desire masquerading as love. What an
oaf that would make me, though I still have not made my final decision
on the matter. I continue to think I loved her better than I ever loved
anyone, and if she interpreted my wanting to do my chosen job in a
proficient way as a negative indication of how I felt about her, then
something I cannot fathom prevented her from accepting it.

I mention all this, not only because it has crushed and confused me,
but because there is also a parallel when I contemplate the things I
have written on the internet. How much do I actually know? How valuable
are my observations? Is the information I pass on reliable?

And I find I can only offer a relative guess as to the validity of
my observations, as I am constantly becoming suspicious of sources I've
relied on in the past.

Recently I reduced my criteria for valid media down to two issues:
willingness to consider 9/11 as a conspiratorial inside job (a test
damned few publications can pass) and willingness to entertain the
notion that Zionism has an ungodly stranglehold on the communications
processes of the United States and the whole world (which precious few
mainstream media outlets — nor political candidates — dare assert).

I think those two points remain valid regardless of which previously
used sources might turn sour. Testing them against my previously used
sources eliminates many of them: virtually all of the so-called popular
leftie alternative sources (like Common Dreams, Alternet and Z magazine,
in particular), absolutely all of the mainstream media, and even some
highly regarded conspiracy publications.

More worryingly, it would seem that many of the big names in the
9/11 info hunt have a suspicious blind spot about Israel and Zionism,
and some of the anti-Zionist sources have a spurious deafness about 9/11
suspicions, so it gets progressively more difficult to sort out who is
in the game for what reason.

Distinguishing these distinctions I consider to be my primary task
on the internet, and I am constantly reanalyzing what I believe about
who and what.

Anyway, that's how I operate, and what gives me ideas for stories.
But now I must return to the major point of this opus.

I am in dire straits, down to my last 500 bucks in fact. My roof
leaks, my car rattles, my rent's due, my internet may get cut off (if I
decide to eat). I eat Lean Cuisine out of boxes and peanut butter
sandwiches (and an occasional Checkers cheeseburger), so I don't have
what you'd call an extravagant lifestyle, nor do I want one.

For nine months I've had one real job — this one — while I collected
unemployment (I was a mostly undistinguished newspaper editor for 30
years), and I don't mean to be melodramatic when I say I've been working
for all of us to try and figure out what's going on.

I am loathe to ask for help, but I find I must if I am to continue
this vocation. The alternative is to go to work in the local glass
factory and turn off my brain to pay my bills.

I'm not asking for charity. I'm asking for you to consider paying me
for these stories. Not each story. And not each person, because I know
so many of you are in the same straits as I am, keeping track of every
dime to make your lives work. From those folks I only want occasional
letters.

Some of you have already sent me money. Don't do it again. Some of
you have graciously asked where you could send some. Here's where: John
Kaminski, 250 N. McCall Rd. #2, Englewood FL 34223.

If you can spare ten bucks, stick it in an envelope and send it to
me. It's too early (and I think illegal) for me to pitch my book before
I actually have it in my hands, but "America's Autopsy Report" costs
$18.95 plus about five bucks shipping and handling. This way I'd
actually be able to order them from my publisher. Otherwise, I might not
be able to. When I get them, I'll autograph it and mail it to you. Tell
me what you would like me to write, or leave it to me (the latter might
be better). I would not tender this offer at such an early stage were my
situation not desperate.

If you like what I write, please lend a hand. I feel uncomfortable
asking, but the alternative for me is worse — not being able to do this.
If what I say is important to you, do what you can.

Some days I feel like I have the most important job in the world.
The only problem with it is that it doesn't pay anything.

Now wait. Don't go running off. I haven't put any fresh news in
here, and what kind of editor would I be if I didn't tantalize you with
some of today's top news tidbits? Here goes.

• An old friend up north reminded me that today (6/28) is Baphomet's
birthday. You remember Baphomet, the evil god, worshipped by those
secret wheelerdealer Masons above the 33rd degree, for which you have to
renounce Christ. Today is the day that George H.W. Bush lies in a
ceremonial coffin and worships the evil god. Just so you remember who's
running the world, or so my friend says.

• Surely you saw the story about how Ashcroft's new Patriot Act II
supposedly contains a provision that will allow functionaries of the
Bush administration to revoke your citizenship if you participate in a
peace demonstration they don't like (and what peace demonstration DO
they like?). We all ought to line up, by the millions, and request this
process, just to see how they'd react. They're going to try to do it to
us soon enough.

• Easily the most inspiring story I read today was about the Neturai
Karta group's statement about how Zionists don't speak for all Jews.
Check this out:

"Neturei Karta’s position towards Muslims and Arabs. The connection
between Muslims and Jews goes right back into ancient history. Mostly
the relationship was friendly and mutually beneficial.

"Historically, the situation frequently was that when Jews were
being persecuted in Europe they found refuge in the various Muslim
countries.

"Our attitude to Muslims and Arabs can only be one of friendliness
and respect.

"To sum up.

"We consider the Palestinians as the people with the right to govern
in Palestine.

"The Zionist oppression, abuse and murder of Arabs is a tragedy not
only for the Palestinians but for the Jewish people as well.

"The continuing existence of the Zionist State is the underlying
cause of the strife in Palestine.

"It must be clear that opposition to Zionism and its crimes does not
imply hatred of Jews. On the contrary Zionism itself and its deeds are
the biggest threat to Judaism.

"Governments of the world should realise that supporting Zionists
and Zionism is not helping Jews or Judaism but only perpetuates the
tragic impasse and constant bloodshed in the Middle East.

"We are waiting for the annulment of Zionism and the dismantling of
the Zionist regime, and would welcome the opportunity to dwell in peace
in the holy land under a rule which is entirely in accordance with the
wishes of the Palestinian People.

Alleluia, my brothers and sisters.

Thanks to Eric Walberg for this. See more at:

http://www.nkusa.org/activities/recent/MABLondon03.cfm

And thank you for any help you might be able to furnish.


John Kaminski is writer who lives in the coast of Florida, and never
stops praying we find peace in our lifetimes.

• Dear Mr. Kaminsky — Les Visible, Sun Jun 29 06:25