Fri Jan 12, 2007 22:40


A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Missouri. He shot and
dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side
of a fence.

As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on
his tractor and asked him what he was doing.

The litigator responded, "I shot a duck. It fell in this field, and
now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming
over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in
the United States and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue
you and take everything you own.

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we
settle disputes in Missouri. We settle small disagreements like this
with the "Three Kick Rule."

The lawyer asked, "What is the Three Kick Rule?"

The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land,
first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so
on back and forth until someone gives up."

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided
that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the
local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to
the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed
work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His
second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from
his mouth. The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick
to his rear end sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet.
Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart.
Now it's my turn."

(I love this part....)

The old farmer smiled and said,

"Naw, I give up. You can have the duck."



Corporate America placed George W. Bush in the White House to wage endless war; to bankrupt the federal treasury to the extent that few social programs will survive, and virtually all of our tax dollars will go into supporting the military industrial complex. The people who put him in office intend to end public ownership of the commons, as well as all government programs that do not directly benefit the wealthy.

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